it's pretty cool that my parents got hitched, i guess

Let me give it to you straight. My parents' marriage is one of the best, most tangible examples I've ever seen of love - unconditional, laugh out loud, love each other through the tough stuff, everybody farts and nobody's smells like roses, still making out "over the hill", straight outta Nicholas Sparks "The Notebook" kind of marriage. 

My friend Ali Kefalos Smith (huge encourager of my writing) sometimes shares these instagram posts that she tags as "honest instas." Well, here's an honest-insta-kind of post....wait for it....

My dad once threw a plate across our backyard. I was in elementary school, and still remember it. He stood up from the table, where we were eating as a family on our patio, and, in serious frustration, flung the blue and white ceramic plate across our backyard. Frisbee-style. I can't make this stuff up. Somehow it landed far out in the grass, undamaged. We all sat their with our mouths open. We might expect a grand gesture like this from my mom in the middle of a heated conversation, but patient Tom, well....

I tell you this so that you know my parents argued. Not all the time and certainly very rarely was it over anything major. But, if your last name is Thornton, Trackwell, Chenoweth, Martin, Gentry, Carrigan, the list is endless, you realize - we Robinsons argue. We push each other's buttons. My parents did that. But their eyes sparkled for each other like characters from  the big screen - my parents were always in love. I don't remember what the argument was that caused the rare overreaction from my dad that day, but I do remember him constantly reaching for my mom's hand when we were driving - somewhere mundane, or on a long roadtrip, or a big event like a friend's wedding - it didn't matter. He was in love. Holding my mom's hand made him happy, even after decades of already doing so. They were romantic. Dad made it evident he had eyes only for my mom. They argued, they played, they worked through life together. 

My parents celebrated their 30th anniversary the July before his plane crash. Thirty years. What once sounded so long, seems too short. Way too short. 

My dad loved cracking jokes, making fun of people he loved, and mostly, turning the jokes on himself. One of his favorite one liners..."Being married to your mom has felt like 10 minutes!... Underwater." Chuckle chuckle chuckle. Good one, Pops. 

Gentry still blushes when he recalls Dad telling him how attractive he found Mom, both when they met, and on that current day. One of the last times I spent with Dad on Lake Marble Falls, his dream home where he would pull my mom close and say "Pinch me, I must be dreaming..." We were on the dock and he blasted the song "The Wobble" from the boat speakers. His feet jumped onto the dock from the boat. He bounced along to the song. "Hey BIG GIRL." he sang. "Baby back it up!!!" My mom was not too thrilled that he said the song reminded him of her. Beyonce and The Wobble, Dad had good taste in music. Danced like a white boy for sure, but still, great taste in music. 

I will forever cherish the handwritten note my mom saved that my dad wrote and left for her to find in their hotel room in New York City. "I love this city, but I love it mostly with you." 

My dad knew he had a keeper when he found my mom. Her bravery is astonishing. She's returned to New York City, with colleagues and friends of my dad, to support them and the company he worked for over twenty years. I know it was painful. I know it was more bitter than sweet, but sweet for sure. I know this: my mom does thing to honor my dad every single day, like keep her cheerfulness to help me and Gentry do the same, like get out of bed everyday and face the world without her teammate, roommate, soulmate if we're going to get cheesy. 

A lot of us love our parents. A lot of us are incredibly thankful for the example that our parents' marriage is for us, as we are adults and getting married, too. A lot of us witnessed extraordinary love in our kitchens, driveways, our living rooms. And I am so, so grateful that Gentry and I are in that group of "a lot of us." 

We will look at pictures of the beautiful couple, young and tanned on their summer wedding day, older and paler on winter ski trips, and all the memories in between, and we will share their story. The commitment Tom and Cathy made on July 31, 1982 will last far beyond their years together on this Earth. We will share their stories. And we will share their love. 

peace like a river

in the past few weeks, it feels like drew and i have been running around a bit frantic. we are thankful that are lives are full, that we are surrounded by adventures and fun and such times of joy, but, it has been exhausting. i am sure you've experienced a similar time in life, when every night is busy and there is no time for rest. sitting in church, early for once, i listened to the music as lunden mcgill played guitar and sang. and these words just sort of rushed out of me and i jotted them on paper. sharing them now in case you need to hear them, as i did. 

come, friends, let us sit. let us be still. 

let our minds slow down, our hearts stop racing, our to-do lists fall by the wayside. 

come, friends, let us be peaceful. 

let our questions and fears and anger and guilt and often unbearable hurt and our anxieties rise up, boil up and over and right on out of us. 

let us be quiet. let us be still. 

let the questions run out of steam, like a train on a track, until the wheels stop turning completely, and peace washes over us. 

peace, like a river. let us be the rocks and the lord the river, coolly and beautifully flowing over us, mere rocks. cleansing us, refreshing us. giving us purpose and refuge and beauty. 

without the glory of the clear water, without the river, we are merely rocks - heavy, ugly, burdensome, clumped together... dry. 

let the floodgates open and the peace rush on down. let the cool waters bind us together - for that is how we were designed, to be together. 

peace like a river, for anyone willing to take it. 

i wish for you, my friends, peace, like a river.