ramblings to pedro

“what you are in love with, what seizes your imagination, will affect everything. it will decide what gets you out of bed in the mornings, what you do with your evenings, how you spend your weekends, what you read, who you know, what breaks your heart, and what amazes you. fall in love, stay in love, and it will decide everything.”- pedro arrupe

Dear Pedro,

Let me start by saying you don’t know me. I don’t know you, either, actually. But I came across your quote on a card once – I’m a huge sucker for cards, stationary shops, snail mail, and I have a hunch you may be the same – which is why I’m writing you.

I’m also writing to ask: how was it that you found your love for which to fall? Because you see, I’ve been searching. Perhaps searching is the wrong word – I haven’t been focused on falling in love, but more on living my life in the hopes the love will appear. It hasn’t yet, I’m sorry to report.

I was touched by your words when I read them. I have since copied them onto several friends’ wedding gifts (always crediting you, you’ll be glad to know) and saved them on my computer to read over several times. Pedro, your words are beautiful, and simple, and moving without being overly dramatic. But, I felt the need to present a crucial point: easier said than done! Easier said than done.

I anticipate, Pedro, that you may respond that your “love” doesn’t have to be a “lover.” It could be a passion for a job, or children, or clean water for developing countries, or rescuing animals, or environmental cleanup, or whatever floats someone’s proverbial boat. You could even be talking about something horrible to love, like money – I’m sure money gets a lot of people out of the bed in the mornings and affects what they read, what amazes them, and decides almost everything. And I get that – what I’m in love with doesn’t have to be a person.

Actually, you could have been writing about faith. I know that my everything should be Jesus, because, Pedro, I believe that God and his grace are the reason I’ve made it thus far in life without going insane. I do believe in the peace that passes understanding. But I’m looking for someone who wants to chase after Jesus with me. With, Pedro. I’m looking for fellowship, comfort, and LOVE from another earthly person. I very much want my love to be a person.

You might have stopped reading at this point, Pedro, and if so, well, I don’t blame you. I started this letter thinking I had a point, and perhaps I do not. But, in case you have a brother or a handsome friend or something, could you please pass this along?

I’m not opposed to meeting someone hilarious, a bit weird, who loves children, dogs, the outdoors, roadtrips, chocolate chip cookies, dancing…Someone who knows how to wear cowboy boots, or is willing to learn. Someone who wouldn’t be frightened by my family. Someone who shares my faith, talks in accents that are not native to him, and believes America and democracy are absolutely worth fighting for.

I know it’s a lot to ask Pedro. In short, I’d like to thank you for your wise, poignant words. I’ll be sure to pass them along to others and continue to accept the fact that God may very well want me to be a white Whoopi Goldberg. Who's that, you ask? Well, you’ve seen Sister Act right? She lives in a convent for much of the movie... Anyways, I’ve taken up enough of your time.

Sincerely yours.