grace under fire

My mom spoke at a national New York Life conference this morning.

The large company, for which my dad worked for 22+ years, asked my mom to talk about him – about how he got in the life insurance business (let go from a bank late 1980s), how much his study group impacted him (a member of said group actually held my dad’s body in his arms in his last moments) and his legacy in the business (he was the number one Houston agent the year before he died.)

My dad was elected as a national officer to serve in 2013 – similar to student council president, in my small mind. He should have been speaking at each of these conferences this fall. But his plane engine should have worked. It did not. So New York Life asked my mom to speak, since he could not.

She got a huge standing ovation in Florida today. My brother and his wife Amy were in the audience; Gentry is there as an employee since he’s taken over Dad’s work and his clients. I am sooooo proud of him, but today's post is about mom. 

My mom is incredible. She is neither a public speaker nor a morning person, and I have countless stories to prove it. But there she was today, at a podium with teleprompters, 1100+ people in the audience, prepped at 7 am for her 8:30 am speech. 8:30 people!!!!

Gentry and I already are busting at the seams with admiration for our mom. What she has been through, how she has not merely survived, but – she is herself. She is our strong, funny mom. She is there for us just like before Dad died.

We put her through two weddings and all the details and parties and showers full of fun friends, when she probably just wanted to stay in bed. But she did it, and she did it with a huge smile. She was our example of doing what Dad would want: continuing to live. Her dad died in March 2013, six months after her husband. Satan worked through different people and terrorized her at times, frivolous lawsuits were threatened, drama everywhere. She remained steadfast, guiding our ship through what felt like a hurricane for most of fall 2012 and continues at time to feel like a storm. 

Through all of that, she has become a public speaker! With the help of a professional speechwriter, who New York Life flew to Houston to meet with her, she has conquered fears in the face of tremendous loss. Who does that?!

I cannot imagine how huge my dad’s grin must be in Heaven. How immensely thankful I am that New York Life asked her to speak. And how in awe of her that she took the call.

Many wives would have politely said no, shied away from this, but my mom knows my dad’s story is one others should hear. My mom knows the value of life insurance (boy, does she.) Many women would be shattered after an accident like my dad’s. 

But not this woman. Tom married Cathy for many reasons. Her strength. Her charm. Her smile. Her faith. Her grit. Her loyalty. Her hospitality.

I’ve seen movies and read books about people who are a fraction of themselves after tragedy. But I've seen firsthand people who are fighters. First Mary, then my mom, have overcome so many obstacles, and continue to do so daily. This isn’t something that goes away, I’ve learned. It bugs the crap out of me when people say “oh it gets so much easier with time.” Liar. It’s been a year and this is no easier. Maybe less fresh, sure, but not easier.

They have such faith. Such courage. Such grace. These two live love in action everyday.

If you’ve read Bob Goff’s book you know what I mean when I say this: 

their lives are the Love Does kind of lives. Love in action. Love doing something.

My mom’s love for her husband and devotion to the Lord got her up on that stage. 

I am so, so, so very proud.