pick your roommates carefully

Public Service Announcement: pick your roommates carefully, my friends. 

In the spirit of the high school graduation that is upon us, I thought it appropriate to discuss the importance of picking your college roommate wisely. You think it's simply a shared room for a year, but you just never know... it could be someone you'll know the rest of your life. Could be someone you have some of the very best times of your life with, and also someone you wade through some of the worst times. You just never know. 

Would you believe that my dad's freshman roommate in college still checks in on me and Gentry and my mom? Shares old pictures, funny stories, memories of Dad. 

And one of my college roommates, for instance, reads every blog post I throw out and always makes time to encourage me to keep writing. Texts, emails, Amy is always letting me know she reads my rambles. 

My dad's roommate of several years at UT-Austin, Steve, had something of a "reputation" in our house growing up. I wonder when Gentry and I tell our children about Pops (my dad) how many times we will mention shenanigans with S.J. 
Dad loved telling us their stories - his eyes would light up and he loved to brag about the trouble they either caused or nearly "escaped."

In fact, when Drew's mom came over to have dinner with my parents for the  very first time, S.J. was there. He and my dad had their annual golf tournament that they hosted each year with their good friend Scott. S.J. was coming over after dinner, my dad assured me. Much later, he said. 

It was a Thursday night, I remember it vividly. There we were, what was a fairly serious/important occasion, with this guy I loved (and hoped to marry!) bringing his mom over to meet my mom and dad. And then... S.J. shows up. And what does he do? He suggests everyone partake in a rum tasting. On a Thursday night. I was half mortified and half thankful for this wild, fun friend of my dad's, someone I had known all my life, who was there to "break the ice" - and pour the shots of rum - as these future in-laws met for the first time. Drew's mom joined in the rum tasting right away, seemingly unfazed by Dad and S.J., the two of them cracking jokes and throwing back some rum. I wanted to explain to Bette that this was not a typical Thursday family dinner, but... you can't really explain S.J. You just embrace the fact that he's fun and his fun is contagious and you roll with it. 

A few weeks ago, S.J. emailed me a picture of a chandelier he saw at a restaurant that made him think of me and my mom's business. S.J. is always forwarding our company's e-newsletter and is actually how our fabulous summer intern heard about Renovate. Steve forwarded our blog to a group of people he works with, and then one of those women emailed her daughter that we were hiring, and viola, she ended up being the best fit for our intern position! 

It should be noted that S.J. is a great hubby - I grew up knowing that his wife Jenny is a total saint - and they are very cute together. Jenny and S.J. came by our studio together this spring and in the middle of our conversation Jenny said "Babe you look really handsome today." As if she was just noticing him for the first time, not that he was the guy she's been waking up next to for decades. S.J. always greets me with a "hey beautiful!" and makes everyone feel welcome. When you're off at college, ladies, keep your eyes open for the wild guys, too. S.J. is proof that they can also turn out to be the really sweet ones. 

Even though I don't seem him all that often, I know Steve is there if I need him. I know that he really knew dad - the good, the bad, the ugly - and I know Steve and his wife loved my mom before my dad passed away and they've done a great job loving on her after. 

Just like my dad, I have been blessed with incredible college roommates, roommates that boost the everyday life from mediocre to this-is-awesome. 

I had a roommate who proposed to a professional baseball player with me. (Still waiting for a final answer from him. He definitely saw us and our cute poster in 2007.) That same roommate completely took me under her wing when I transferred from TCU to A&M, and many of my best memories in Aggieland involve her. 

A roommate who broke the news to me that our friend Jay's cancer had spread to his brain, because my parents didn't think they could tell me on the phone while I was in D.C. Not an easy task, and certainly not something you have to do simply because you share a kitchen with someone. 

A roommate who once spent HOURS sketching giant posters for my Teach for America preschool class when I didn't have any ounce of artistic ability to do so myself. 

Another roommate who gave me her prescription cream to get rid of ring worm when I caught it from a student. That's true friendship, folks, when you'll share your prescription ring worm cream with another. 

All this to say, the people that I shared a roof with throughout college and life after, still mean the world to me. Two of my roommates during my semester in D.C. were a huge part of why I enjoyed the city so much, which led me to accept a job there and gave me the courage to stay in D.C. for another nine months. 

I think eventually, usually, it's very common that after years pass, you tend to grow apart from roommates, certainly those from your freshman year of college. 

But not in the case of S.J. and my dad. Even after one of them has left the earth, they're still close. They still look out for each other. S.J. has made it clear he's around for whatever I might need - a random phone call, old pics of my dad - And someday, when Thomas is old enough, S.J. will tell stories of Dad in a way that very few people will be able to do. And though Drew and I may have to censor his stories until Thomas is, oh... thirty... we are still so grateful he'll be there to keep Dad's memory living on and to help our kids feel like they knew this man that means so very much to us. 

So homies, if you're filling out your dorm paperwork anytime soon, keep your wits about you. Choose wisely. Choose responsibly. Or, in the case of Robo and S.J., maybe DON'T choose responsibly, and things will work out just fine. And eventually, after many years, (and for some people mentioned here I really mean many) you'll graduate from college.  

As always, thank you for reading. And... Happy Graduation, class of two-thousand-and-you-make-me-feel-old.