This past weekend, my dad and my brother and I did the Marble Falls Triathlon. It’s a 1km swim (.74 miles), 23 mi bike ride, and 4.4 mi run. Very manageable, when you look at it on paper. Not so much if you do not adequately prepare.
This was my brother’s fourth year to participate and my dad’s third. It was my first, and though I thought my week of hiking with a heavy backpack in Colorado would boost my training, I have not been swimming or biking nearly enough. 3 hours and 10 minutes later, I was really glad I did it, but I was a sweaty, defeated mess. Tom & Gentry were very supportive and smiled at me every time they passed me, and my mom, grandmother, and good friend Renza woke up early to drive the chase car as we rode on the highway. All in all, I was glad that I proved I could do it, just like a turtle: slow and steady wins the race. It was really, really, really hard, and as I ran the first mile I doubted my sanity. Three more miles to go? I reminded myself of the gift I have, the ability to move my feet one in front of the other, a healthy body that I need to challenge.
In addition to being inspired by my dad and brother and motivated to sign up for another tri, (and actually train more), I learned a few things along the way. In the spirit of “sharing is caring,” you can find my newfound knowledge below.
A few things I’ve learned about the Marble Falls triathlon:
1) I’ll see you in the arctic. Out of the 360 something participants, there were approximately 3 chubby people. We stuck out like sore thumbs prior to entering the lake. I think my next tri will be somewhere in the arctic so that everyone is covered up as much as possible prior to the swim. Because standing around in a swimsuit for 20 minutes among hundreds of legit athletes sounds more like torture than a “fun goal to set and reach for.”
2) When I’m famous/governor of Texas (please note I did not say if) I’ll have to put a stop to all of this nonsense. For the two (short) triathlons I’ve done, my least favorite part was exiting the lake with people standing around, taking mental pictures of my wobbly bits as I remove a bright red swim cap and attempt to run towards my bicycle while I’m soaking wet. Can you imagine the paparazzi there to capture it on film? No. Jennifer Lopez can do triathlons all she wants. Famous me, on the other hand? No way, Jose.
3) Triathlon officials are mean. They must be, because why else would they have all participants write their age on their calf? Here’s why: they want everyone to see it and know how old other participants are and therefore how fit they should be. I’ll tell ya, there’s nothing quite like the feeling of peddling your bike up a hill, thinking you’re doing pretty good, breathing quickly but not about to die, and then, whoosh, “on your left” goes a 45 year old woman dressed in pink from head to toe. Or a 52 year old man. Or a 73 year old thin as a stick old man who smiles as he passes you-as if he’s enjoying it! Because he is. Really, triathlon officials, I’m already getting passed. Do I really need to know how much older than me the person is who just flew by me? I think not.
4) Spandex is awkward. I doubt you need me to elaborate on this one.
5) I absolutely love riding down steep hills. Again, elaboration unnecessary.
6) Little in life compares to the feeling of being passed by your father, who started the race three minutes after you and cannot swim to save his life, who should be thirty minutes behind you but instead is passing you about five miles into your bike ride, well… not much can top that. Worst part was, I heard someone in a chipper voice say “Good Morning” to the lady biking behind me. (Yes, there were in fact, people behind me.) I glanced over my left shoulder, and there he was, peddling away, smiling and nodding at me. I could only gather enough oxygen to mutter “I knew it was you.” I knew the perky, cheerful man must be my father.
7) Having a friend off to the side to do cheerleading jumps and chant your name and say “Do it for the Teach for America kids!!!!!” is something you just can’t buy or achieve through training. If you could, I would recommend everyone purchase a Renza Sharpe before race day.
8) Training is, surprisingly enough, not overrated. I had basically given up on the biking portion of training, other than a few spin classes at the gym recently. Other than a 10 mile ride with my dad on a stretch of highway three days prior to the race, I was not ready for the 23 very hilly ride. So the fact that a) I never got off to walk b) I did not cry c) I pretty much enjoyed myself and d) I averaged my goal of 14 mph, I feel pretty good about myself. And a bit embarrassed that I did such little training. Oopsies, see you next year I guess.
What remains unknown after the Marble Falls triathlon:
1) Who in the world eats those brownies post-race? I saw the scrumptious brownies lying out near the water buckets after I crossed the finish line. And I saw the hundreds of thin, toned, athletic people standing around celebrating the fact they’d finished, set a personal record, etc. And I just do not understand who eats the post race brownies, because it cannot be the triathletes with 3.2% body fat who finished an hour before I did. And if it is, I’d like to push ‘em back into the lake.
2) Where does my father finds his strength/energy/athletic ability? He’s 52 and crazy if you ask me. And, it must be said, a horrible swimmer. At least I have him beat there.
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